After a lot of work and studying and everything
together I went for my escape. It was supposed to be great 6 days with awesome
people. And it was. And then at the end it all fell apart. Once again: you
promised me heaven, you put me to hell, repeated itself.
I came with no delays in my flight and met Rick at the
airport. He greeted me with a balloon [oh balloons], even if by the time I got
there it broke, it was still a sweet thing to do. We got to his place, had a
few beers, dinner and a movie. It was an easy night, because he had to work and
I had to go to another city to meet my friend.
On Thursday I packed my little day bag, took a bike
[proper city bike that I still don’t know how to bike properly], got lost on my
way to the central station, but at the end managed to get there in one piece
and went for Rotterdam. There I met Alex, we walked around the city [which is
nice, but not too much to see though]. I met his band, we had dinner, had some
fun and I headed back to Amsterdam. I was a little afraid to get lost again and
did not want to come back too late, because my host, from the working class,
had to work the next day again.
So the next day I did my sightseeing in Amsterdam. I walked
all around the main places: squares, streets, canals, millions of canals [or 88
beautiful canals]. I took pictures, I watched people, I did a lot of thinking
and I was just plainly enjoying the company of myself.
I got back to Rick’s place, we had dinner and talked
and soon after that it was time to go to a concert. I had no idea who was
playing but he said it was supposed to be good so I believed him. At this point
I almost trusted my biking skills with a city bike. Boy, did that burned fastly.
Because apparently, biking after a local seems like a trap. He was going fast,
ignoring red lights, against the traffic. I was shouting at him, laughing, I was
scared completely and cursed a lot. I was literally so happy when we finally
stopped at the bar that I still was alive. Here we met his friends and listened
to the concert.
It was good, the concert. Not exactly, but on some
level they reminded me of Suicide DJs. Not traditional sort of sounds,
different instruments, different languages and only 2 people on the stage. We had
fun. Then at the end we biked through the city a bit, stopped for one drink,
talked about first kisses and all that and finally had to bike back home
through the rain.
Off topic
You know that feeling when you look into someone eyes
and you realize something very important. And you want to say it out loud, but
something holds you back. So you sit there, swallow the words that just came to
the tip of your tongue and hope it was a right thing to do. At the end you
never know if that was smart way to go or a really stupid one. One way or
another, you cannot change it anymore.
So the next day we had to wake up pretty early, catch
a train and get to Antwerp. It was a silly thing a little, but I needed to see
Alex playing live and since concert was in Antwerp, I had no choice. We got
some kind of BB there [not exactly, but you stay at someone’s place and pay for
it, I don’t know] – this amazing room of some artist’s [I am guessing, because
all of the things in the place screamed there has to live some artistic
person]. We went for a walk, we met Petra and Valery, had some very nice talks.
Later on we met Didier, had a little walk around the city [it was sunny and
very great day] and then he gave us a ride to the concert.
It was a one day strangely planned and organizer
festival. There were so little people, that at some point I thought we are in
the wrong place. We listened to Alex and his band playing, I made way too many
pictures. Then we stayed and talked with them and finally went to search for
tram. It was a long and cold way back to the place and then it was so good to
get under those warm covers..
Next day it was raining, so we only had breakfast and
headed back to Amsterdam. We met Alex [such a small world] in the train again,
left them in Rotterdam and went home. We did some shopping and baked a brownie.
And man, that was some delicious brownie. Especially the next day. Like a piece
of heaven. So awesome, that I want to have it again.
Monday came soon and I went on my sightseeing day No 2
around the Amsterdam. I walked and walked and then rain started. So I got
completely soaked. I was still ready to keep on going and the sun started
shining, so at the end I decided to keep on getting lost and finding amazing
things in the city. That was right until I saw this big cloud above me. I ran
for my bike and started biking for home. I didn’t make it on time, of course. Firstly,
I got lost without looking at the map and then I had to turn back and take the
other root.. long story short – I got heavy rain on me again and by the time I got
back home, I was soaked again.
When Rick showed up, we had dinner and talked a little
before he had to go to football practice. I stayed in, since it was raining
non-stop. Alex decided to come to the city, so I went to pick him up and we
ended up talking about Greek Easter, TV shows and all the other fun things. After
a bit Rick went to sleep, and then soon enough me and Alex joined the dreams
kingdom as well.
On my last day in Amsterdam I allowed myself to sleep
a little longer, then went for breakfast with Alex. We took the tram, went to
the city, walked around Amsterdam for the last time and then we separated – he went
to meet a friend for a coffee and I went to the train station to meet Rick and
get to the airport.
After a long goodbye I took my stuff, got on the plane
and in a mere moment landed in rainy Copenhagen. I went to the Dubs, because I needed
to talk to someone. Good thing I found Gosia there, so I had my part of friend
there. At the end I took metro, went home and slept.
And now the old/new schedule starts again. Dealing with
same things, working again and trying to finish my studies. Nothing more to
add.
Off Topic
Funny how things work sometimes. World, is this a new
battle, again? Just when I thought I actually proved myself wrong and managed
to open up again, you slam the doors to my face? Are you just enjoying messing
up with my system? I don’t want to crash, and so I won’t. but I would still
like to understand the reason.
Why you take it from me and in probably the best
possible way for this situation that makes me feel even worse? Is this your way
of saying – this is not for you. Get over it. Get with the program?
Because I am not so sure anymore.
Maybe I should have told something. Maybe I still
should. I still cannot make up my mind. I want to take a risk. And I am quite
sure I am willing to make a change. I am just afraid to make it worse. And no,
not for me. For the people I care about.
One last chance?
I found our song. And now I think I will have to
delete it from my playlist.
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