It's an interesting phase I am trying to live through, I have to say.
And with every day it is getting harder and harder. I am starting to feel like one of those people, you know, depressed ones. Not the `oh my god, I am so depressed, because my parents bought me white iphone instead of black`, but more like `I want nothing, I want just to stay in bed and wait for the day to pass`.
How did I get myself into this all? Or maybe the better question is - why?
And you have the answers. Although you would not share. Like that fatty boy in a kindergarten, who was always trying to get a hold of all of the toys.
I had a very intense walk down the memory lane the other day. Cannot explain exactly why, just remembered it. Little pieces of the puzzle that do not answer anything and provide little, but still a smile.
We could have been happy.
I could have made you happy.
You are now thinking the exact same thing.
But the up-to-date life is different. After all of the thinking and deciding and over-thinking I quit The Dubliner. Just like that, one day I came, told them I am not going to be coming back in, finished my scheduled shifts, had one last shot with the staff, one last beer as a staff and it was over.
Staff will be missed. Especially a few, for some reason, very special people.
Soon after that I've got an interview in another place, probably/maybe got the job, waiting for the contract to be signed. Still in a waiting mode.
I got the results from my doctor. Promising results, I guess, even though there are slight changes and if scenario `all goes well` doesn't take place, it could be the very beginning of the pre-cancerous cells formation. Not that I am much worried. Just... confused.
And I went to see `Before Midnight`. By myself in an almost empty theater, once again enjoying the story, that's been going on for 20 years and I have been following for the last few. It seems so real and so down to earth. No pink elephants, no unrealistic faces or actions. Just real people and real conversations.
Something that makes me feel like I am starting to believe in Love again.
Off Topic
Tomorrow will be three weeks and one day left.
The naive part of me still has some faith, while the rational one tells me to pack the bags. Take the Romeo by his hand and run for the stars. Shooting stars. With AK-47.
And with every day it is getting harder and harder. I am starting to feel like one of those people, you know, depressed ones. Not the `oh my god, I am so depressed, because my parents bought me white iphone instead of black`, but more like `I want nothing, I want just to stay in bed and wait for the day to pass`.
How did I get myself into this all? Or maybe the better question is - why?
And you have the answers. Although you would not share. Like that fatty boy in a kindergarten, who was always trying to get a hold of all of the toys.
I had a very intense walk down the memory lane the other day. Cannot explain exactly why, just remembered it. Little pieces of the puzzle that do not answer anything and provide little, but still a smile.
We could have been happy.
I could have made you happy.
You are now thinking the exact same thing.
But the up-to-date life is different. After all of the thinking and deciding and over-thinking I quit The Dubliner. Just like that, one day I came, told them I am not going to be coming back in, finished my scheduled shifts, had one last shot with the staff, one last beer as a staff and it was over.
Staff will be missed. Especially a few, for some reason, very special people.
Soon after that I've got an interview in another place, probably/maybe got the job, waiting for the contract to be signed. Still in a waiting mode.
I got the results from my doctor. Promising results, I guess, even though there are slight changes and if scenario `all goes well` doesn't take place, it could be the very beginning of the pre-cancerous cells formation. Not that I am much worried. Just... confused.
And I went to see `Before Midnight`. By myself in an almost empty theater, once again enjoying the story, that's been going on for 20 years and I have been following for the last few. It seems so real and so down to earth. No pink elephants, no unrealistic faces or actions. Just real people and real conversations.
Something that makes me feel like I am starting to believe in Love again.
Off Topic
Tomorrow will be three weeks and one day left.
The naive part of me still has some faith, while the rational one tells me to pack the bags. Take the Romeo by his hand and run for the stars. Shooting stars. With AK-47.
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