.For the days that turn into nights and for the friends that turns into family.
Yes I am repeating it for quite some time and it’s not even that special, but it means something. Well, ok, it means something to me, maybe not to you.
My life reached other level. Heights, in fact. Things are happening, things are changing, I am leaving and it actually gets me. It’s a good thing, don’t get me wrong, although getting the feeling that JOLG’a is not going to be around the times you need and the times you don’t – is a down side of this whole situation.
And still JOLG’a ir rocking, no matter how in the different sides of the world it will be happening.
.Shopping.
I found a new almost favorite hobby. Shopping. And no, you don’t have to laugh that hard. I can do shopping. I can also do fun shopping. And I am actually pretty good at that. Of course, my shopping is way different from the one that normal people have in mind.
My first fun shopping experience was way back. Don’t remember when exactly but it was still hot day, I was still optimistic about my school not messing things up for me and writing my thesis when I got a call from a friend, a.k.a. invitation for shopping. I wasn’t a big fan of shopping at the moment, but anything is better than just sitting in on a Saturday afternoon and boring yourself to death with the thesis thing. So I went out. First we had a small walk, then went into couple of shops for a little tiny bit of the time. And then it was a time for beer. We went to this Italian place, I don’t recall a name, but it was perfect. The storm came just in the middle of our eating, but it only made the whole day more memorable. So anyways, we ordered some Italian gorgeous taste soup [can taste be gorgeous by the way?] and went for the beer. The bartender turned out to be a very talkative and very nice guy. He made us beers in a special kind of way, talked with us about Italy, Italian food and coffee and everything. Very nice indeed, made us even happier with the shopping afternoon. We sat, we ate, drank and talked. It was awesome. We even decided to try that great `real Italian tasting` coffee the bartender said he knows how to make. If you believe what my shopping partner says – it was awesome coffee, the best espresso she had in Lithuania. If you ask me – I am not that good in tasting differences, but it was a good coffee. The bartender told us next time we come – coffee will be on the house. Well, isn’t that just wonderful? We left him with a smile and we left with even bigger ones.
Ok, beer – check, shopping needs to be done. We entered couple of more shops. We even bought couple of things. Yes, it maybe took us 75 minutes for beer and 15 minutes with shops, but who’s counting?
We entered another shopping mole. Once again – several shops entered – check. Time for another beer. We went into this pancakes kind of place, ordered a pancake each and a beer. Once again, sitting, talking, chatting. Fun shopping, no doubts there. Our waiter, once again, an interesting guy. He was a friendly person, he talked and joked with us. He was even entertaining himself buy frightening me, since I had my back turned to the waiters’/waitresses’ area, and coming from the back and saying something in a low frightening voice. Anyways, it was fun.
And the best part – we did the shopping. And it lasted for a long time. And it was fun. And we bought some stuff and we had a great time. Awesome. Somehow I feel a need for the same type of experience.
The second shopping happened pretty recently. And the best part of it – loads of stuff bought without even leaving your room. Yes, it’s a virtual, on-line shopping. And for me – a total freshman in the field, it was extremely lucky one. So I made my list, send it to my friend [who did the major purchasing part] and waited for the things to arrive. And they did – lucky for me, before my departure.
I went to pick up my stuff. Everything fitted, we made a little fashion show, trying on things, laughing and talking and decided to go and celebrate this with a beer. It turned out into a very nice and fun night. Girls night out, a lot of talks of the boys..
I went home smiling and thinking about how damn pinky happy I am. And then I thought of a friend. A friend I haven’t seen for ages and started wondering how she was. And how many times it happens? I see her walking towards me in the street. Out of nowhere. Just there. Unbelievable.
I ended up going to sleep with a broad huge smile on my face. Unbelievable I thought. This is what I call good days. This is what can be considered to be a fantastic shopping.
JOLG’a
We had a farewell girls-night-out. As if I was leaving somewhere. First we had a plan, then we had an additional sort of plan. Finally – we ended up with no plan, but great planning.
Started with a nice, kinda romantic, silent place with a nice overview. Easy, chill. Nice. Then we went for a meal place, had a fantastic pizza in a nice atmospheric space. It was nice, but it was a bit too pricy for our taste, so we moved. We moved to a small, cozy place with cheap beer, nice bartender, good French fries, big turtle in a tiny aquarium and on top of that – basketball game! Do I need to mention we stayed in for the whole game? Of course at the very end Lithuania lost by 2 points, but the game was still nice.
Going to the separate corners is always a pain in one place after you have such an awfully awesome time. But some of us had to work the next day, some of us had a plumbing emergencies.. so we took a cab to my place, where I left my bags with my girls and went to sleep, once again, with a huge smile on my face.
I’ve got friends. Yeah, I’ve got friends. In your face, amigo.
And you know what – I will be coming back. For more. And I will live a perfect awesomely chaotic life. And I will love it. Just like I love it now. They say your adventure has begun. Mine is getting to the new levels. Who knows where to stop?
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Some things change or doesn’t change, I cannot tell, but experiencing them again [or freshly from the very beginning] is exciting every single time. And I did. I did them I enjoyed and it was, once again, an interesting experience all over again. Somewhat known, somewhat new. Strange feeling, just like being a character in Murakami’s book.
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Girls and nights.
Friday night started itself promising. I managed to wake up earlier than normally, go to the office, check who is coming to work early, very early, go back to the living area and finally get driven to work in a fancy-carry way. The work was, I am not going to surprise anyone, nothing too special. Although it ended soon enough and I was driven back to the city in the same fancy-carry way. Aren’t I just a lucky kid?
Ok, so since my ordinary B&B place was already shut for the weekend, I joined my girls. W started our night with conversation over ice-cream and cocktails, then girls got ready and we hit the road. We ate lasagna [pretty perfect taste, by the way] in the `small hoof` kind of alcohol-free tiny restaurant. It was great and if you ever feel a need for a real good tasting Italian food – you should definitely go to that place [and not, they do not pay me for the marketing services].
The night was swinging back and forth, bringing us from one cozy bar to another, where we played some table football, had some drinks, moved to another bar, played some table football, had some drinks. And so at the end of one of the parts of it, we decided to split. On our way home we entered the best-worst food place: Mcdonalds. Just a simple passionate need for a junk food won us over. We got back to her place, opened a bottle of wine and enjoyed it with burgers and night sky, full of shiny stars and a conversation, that just cannot be ended at an appropriate hour.
We went to sleep. Two hours later we woke up. Not happy, not relaxed. Very tired and very sleepy. But, the new day was about to begin and we had to start it. Somehow. Morning was freshening and very nice. Early, very early morning with sun coming up, no people around, just birds and some cats. It was almost as if you are in the nowhere land, even if we were in the city center. Anyways, we separated in the station – she moved to the bus, I joined the train-waiters.
My day was a little busy and those 2 hours of sleep didn’t help a bit. I got my license [now I can officially kill myself in the roads. Ironic isn’t it – I had a request not to do that before we meet and now there is no meet].,
Getting mixed up in the circles
I got a haircut, I made some more things and went to watch a basketball game. My naïve and optimistic head was sure – just a basketball game, one beer and I am going home, to sleep and this whole weekend will not be totally sleepless. Could I be any more wrong? Basketball was followed by a little Frenchy conversation and some laughs, that was followed by B.O. [a.k.a. still THE best place in Kaunas to hang out] and then finally – nostalgic kind of new-old place. All-in-all I got back home later than I thought from the very beginning, but it ended being a pretty good night. I met a guy I haven’t seen for ages and it was fun to talk through the lives of ours, even if only for a little bit.
As if two hours of last night wasn’t enough, the next morning, a.k.a. on Sunday I woke up way too early, way too sleepy. Well, whatever, I had stuff I needed to do. I went to the shop, I found a sword, full of soap bubbles. Not just for me – for my friend as well. Later that day I got a call. From a friend. We were supposed to meet up at some point, but honestly, I didn’t think we would find the exact time when we both could do it. But we did. A short meet up thing turned into couple of hours and I have to say – it was awesome. He was tired, I was tired, but we had great conversations and it was very much fun being around him. It’s just like when you meet someone and you don’t want it to end. When he drove me to my mom’s place and dropped me off, I only could say `let’s do it again. I very much want that`. And I am very much hoping that we will. I mean, I will still have ~3 days in the same city as he – the lightning might strike twice, therefore, we might meet again.
I spent the evening pretty chilly – going to the store, buying some stuff, going back to my friend’s place, watching couples series of classic and with no doubts the best TV show `Friends` and went to sleep.
The other lightning stroke the next day – a.k.a. The Black Monday. It was a bad day alright. It ended pretty damn great, but it doesn’t make the fact, that it was a bad day at all. If it was only a bad day, I could maybe live with it, but it is bringing some baggage with it to my tomorrow, and me no like it. Anyways, I made the almost best of it: I met my girls for the very last time. We had the very last talk and laugh. We ate an awesome burger [I want one again, by the way], we talked things through, we said our goodbyes for the probably last time this time and separated to the corners.
I wasn’t about just to let it hang. I needed to get it out of the system. I was going crazy. The lightning stroke heavier than expected. I got back to my friend’s place and then it all started rolling. I talked to my friend I haven’t seen for ages and I need to see, but she is 350 kilometers away. I talked to another friend and we started making fake `let’s travel together` plans, then a brilliant idea about possibility of going to meet the first friend came, that was followed by a conversation and boom – we are going out for beers. Sure, that’s just a great idea to start the week and finish Monday. On the other hand – it was The Black Monday, I had white card for it. Anything I did could have been used against me that day. Not that I did anything bad or something.
Off topic.
It is not jealousy. But something definitely is. It’s not good, it’s not ok. It can’t last, although it seems as it will. It’s going to be a mistake, but there is no way someone can be saved from the mistakes he/she wants to make.
Do it. I do not care anymore. No, it’s a lie. I do care. And not because I wanted or still want this. It’s because you don’t want. Or do you?
Is it still possible? I caught myself wondering. It feels right, but it also feels definitely wrong. I wanted this for I don’t even remember how long. And yet again, it was always unwritten law. Not this way. Not like that. Almost as if forever in our world always meant never. Well, you do the math, I’ll go collect the tomatoes.
Here and there again. The same old casino. It’s the very same casino at the edge of the world. You are sitting in front of me, smiling. No wait, you are not at the same old casino. You are somewhere far away. Here’s my chance. Here’s my damn only chance I’ve got in this same old casino. Like almost breaking the spell. I place my highest bet – my heart. I know I will win. You are not here. There is no one to mess it up. I will win. Therefore I am placing my highest bet.
A tap on a shoulder. And my heart goes away. I lost. I lost it all again. Once again, I am being dragged and kick out from the casino. There is no way back.
Please tell me there is a back door. I need to get back in. I cannot stay on this side of the door. I need to get inside.
-And the irony is: I am right now reading a book about how to win. Not to loose. But I don’t want to win. I just want to get back.-
/Just a small town girl, livin' in a lonely world
She took the midnight train goin' anywhere/
And I will never give up on Love. It just doesn‘t matter. And it‘s not worth it. I will never give up. And I will never stop believing. I only hope I will get my chances right up straight.
G‘morning.
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